They Do It With... - Chez Goodman 
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Originally compiled by Chris Morton.

- M -
Mac programmers do it in windows. Mac users do it with mice. Machine coders do it in bytes. Machine language programmers do it very fast. Machinists do it with screw drivers. Machinists drill often. Machinists make the best screws. MacIntosh programmers do it in Windows. Mages do it with their familiars. Magic users do it with their hands. Magic users have crystal balls. Magicians are quicker than the eye. Magicians do it with mirrors. Magicians do it with rabbits. Mailmen do it at the mail boxes. Maintenance men sweep 'em off their feet. Malingerers do it as long as they can't get out of it. Mall walkers do it slowly. Managers do it by delegation. Managers have someone do it for them. Managers make others do it. Managers supervise others. Marketing reps do it on commission. Married people do it with frozen access. Masons do it secretively. Match makers do it with singles. Match makers do it with sticks. Math majors do it by example. Math majors do it by induction. Math majors do it with a pencil. Mathematicians do it as a finite sum of an infinite series. Mathematicians do it as continuous function. Mathematicians do it associatively. Mathematicians do it commutatively. Mathematicians do it constantly. Mathematicians do it continuously. Mathematicians do it discretely. Mathematicians do it exponentially. Mathematicians do it forever if they can do one and can do one more. Mathematicians do it functionally. Mathematicians do it homologically. Mathematicians do it in fields. Mathematicians do it in groups. Mathematicians do it in imaginary domain. Mathematicians do it in imaginary planes. Mathematicians do it in numbers. Mathematicians do it in theory. Mathematicians do it on smooth contours. Mathematicians do it over and under the curves. Mathematicians do it parallel and perpendicular. Mathematicians do it partially. Mathematicians do it rationally. Mathematicians do it reflexively. Mathematicians do it symmetrically. Mathematicians do it to prove themselves. Mathematicians do it to their limits. Mathematicians do it totally. Mathematicians do it transcendentally. Mathematicians do it transitively. Mathematicians do it variably. Mathematicians do it with imaginary parts. Mathematicians do it with linear pairs. Mathematicians do it with logs. Mathematicians do it with Nobel's wife. Mathematicians do it with odd functions. Mathematicians do it with prime roots. Mathematicians do it with relations. Mathematicians do it with rings. Mathematicians do it with their real parts. Mathematicians do it without limit. Mathematicians do over an open unmeasurable interval. Mathematicians have to prove they did it. Mathematicians prove they did it. Mathematicians take it to the limit. Mds only do it if you have appropriate insurance. Mechanical engineering majors do it in gear. Mechanical engineers do it automatically. Mechanical engineers do it with fluid dynamics. Mechanical engineers do it with stress and strain. Mechanics do it from underneath. Mechanics do it on their backs. Mechanics do it with oils. Mechanics have to jack it up and then do it. Medical researchers do it with mice. Medical researchers make mice do it first. Medievalists do it with fake, fluffy weapons. Merchants do it to customers. Mermaids can't do it. Metallurgists are screw'n edge. Metallurgists do it in the street. Meteorologists do it unpredictably. Methodists do it by numbers. Milkmen deliver twice a week. Millionaires pay to have it done. Milton Berle does it in his BVDs. Mimes do it without a sound. Mimes don't do it; everyone hates a mime. Miners do it deeper than divers. Miners sink deeper shafts. Ministers do it on Sundays. Ministers do it vicariously. Missile engineers do it in stages. Missilemen have better thrust. Mobius strippers never show you their back side. Models do it beautifully. Models do it in any position. Models do it with all kinds of fancy dresses on. Modem manufacturers do it with all sorts of characters. Molecular biologists do it with hot probes. Monks do it by hand. Moonies do it within sects. Morticians do it gravely. Most of the graduate students get aids. Mothers do it with their children. Motorcyclists do it with spread legs. Motorcyclists like something hot between their legs. Moto-X'ers do it in the dirt. Mountain climbers do it on the rocks. Mountaineers do it with ropes. Movie stars do it on film. Mudders do it over the internet. Multitaskers do it everywhere: concurrently. Music hackers do it at 3 am. Music hackers do it audibly. Music hackers do it in concert. Music hackers do it in scores. Music hackers do it with more movements. Music hackers do it with their organs. Music hackers want to do it in realtime. Music majors do it in a chord. Musicians do it rhythmically. Musicians do it with rhythm. ^Top
- N -
Native Amazonians do it with poison tips down along narrow tubes. Native Americans do it with reservations. Navigators can show you the way. Necrophiliacs do it cryptically. Necrophiliacs do it until they are dead tired. Nerds do it in rot13. Network hackers know how to communicate. Network managers do it in many places at once. New users do it after reading the helpfile. New users do it after receiving advice. Newsmen do it at six and eleven. Newspaper boys do it in front of every door. Nike just does it. Nike wants you to just do it. Ninjas do it silently. Ninjas do it in articulated sock.s Non-smokers do it without huffing and puffing. Novices do it with instructions. Nuclear engineers do it hotter than anyone else. Nukes do it with more power. Number theorists do it "69". Nuns do it out of habit. Nuns do it with the holy spirit. Nurses are prepared to resuscitate. Nurses call the shots. Nurses do it as the doctor ordered. Nurses do it painlessly. Nurses do it to patients. Nurses do it with aseptic technique. Nurses do it with care. Nurses do it with fluid restriction. Nurses do it with TLC. ^Top
- O -
Oarsmen stroke till it hurts. Obsessive-compulsive people do it habitually. Oceanographers do it down under. Operator does it automatically. Operator does it in the cty. Operators do it person-to-person. Operators mount everything. Operators really know how to mount it. Optimists do it without a doubt. Optometrists do it eyeball-to-eyeball, since they always see eye-to-eye. Optometrists do it face-to-face. Organists do it with both hands and both feet. Organists pull out all the stops and do it with their feet. Orthodontists do it with braces. OS people would do it if only they didn't 'deadlock'. Osteopaths do it until you feel no pain. ^Top
- P -
Painters do it out in the field with brightly coloured sticky substances. Painters do it with longer strokes. Paladins do it good or not at all. Paladins don't do it. Pantomimists do it silently. Paramedics can revive anything. Paratroopers do it by vertical insertion. Particle physicists do it energetically. Particle physicists to it with *charm*. Pascal programmers are better structured. Pascal programmers repeat it. Pascal users do it with runtime support. Pastors do it with spirit. Pathologists do it with corpses. Patients do it in bed, sometimes with great pain. Pediatricians do it with children. Penguins do it down south. Perfectionists do it better. Perverted hackers do it with pops. Pessimists can't do it. Pessimists do it with a sigh. Pharmacologists do it by prescription. Pharmacologists do it via the oral route. Pharmacologists do it with affinity. Philosophers do it for pure reasons. Philosophers do it in their minds. Philosophers do it with their minds. Philosophers go deep. Philosophers think about doing it. Philosophers think they do it. Philosophers wonder why they did it. Photographers are better developed. Photographers do it at 68 degrees or not at all. Photographers do it in the dark. Photographers do it while exposing. Photographers do it with "enlargers." Photographers do it with a flash. Photographers do it with a zoom. Phototherapists do it with the lights on. Physicists do it a quantum at a time. Physicists do it at the speed of light. Physicists do it at two places in the universe at one time. Physicists do it attractively. Physicists do it energetically. Physicists do it in black holes. Physicists do it in waves. Physicists do it like Einstein. Physicists do it magnetically. Physicists do it on accelerated frames. Physicists do it particularly. Physicists do it repulsively. Physicists do it strangely. Physicists do it up and down, with charming color, but strange! Physicists do it with black bodies. Physicists do it with charm. Physicists do it with large expensive machinery. Physicists do it with rigid bodies. Physicists do it with tensors. Physicists do it with their vectors. Physicists do it with uniform harmonic motion. Physicists get a big bang. Physics majors do it at the speed of light. Piano players have faster fingers. Piano students learn on their teachers' instruments. Pilots do it higher. Pilots do it in the cockpit. Pilots do it on the wing. Pilots do it to get high. Pilots do it with flare. Pilots keep it up longer. Pilots stay up longer. Ping-pong players always smash balls. Pirates do it for the booty. Pirates do it with stumps. Pizza delivery boys come in 30 minutes, or it's free. Plasma physicists do it with everything stripped off. Plasterers to it hard. Players do it in a team. Plumbers do it under the sink. Plumbers do it with plumber's friends. Podiatrists do it with someone else's feet. Poker players do it with their own hand. Polaroid does it in one step. Polaroid does it in seconds. Pole vaulters do it with long, flexible instruments. Policemen like big busts. Policemen never cop out. Politicians do it for 4 years then have to get re-elected. Politicians do it for 4 years then have to get re-erected. Politicians do it to everyone. Politicians do it to make the headlines. Politicians do it with everyone. Politicians do it, but they stay in too long and make you pay for it afterwards. Polymer chemists do it in chains. Pool cleaners do it wet. Popes do it in the woods. Post office workers do it overnight, guaranteed for $8.90. Postmen are first class males. Postmen come slower. Presbyterians do it decently and in order. Priests do it with amazing grace. Prince Charles does it in succession. Printers do it without wrinkling the sheets. Printers reproduce the fastest. Probate lawyers do it willingly. Procrastinators do it later. Procrastinators do it tomorrow. Procrastinators will do it tomorrow. Procrastinators will do it when they get around to it. Proctologists do it in the end. Proctologists do it with a finger up where the sun don't shine. Professors do it by the book. Professors do it from a grant. Professors do it with class. Professors don't do it; they leave it as an exercise for their students. Professors forget to do it. Programmers cycle forever, until you make them exit. Programmers do it all night. Programmers do it bottom-up. Programmers do it by pushing and popping. Programmers do it in higher levels. Programmers do it in loops. Programmers do it in software. Programmers do it on command. Programmers do it top down. Programmers do it with bugs. Programmers do it with disks. Programmers have: bigger disks. Programmers peek before they poke. Programmers repeat it until done. Programmers will do it all night, but only if you are debugged. Prolog programmers are a cut above the rest. Promiscuous hackers share resources. Prostitutes do it at illegal addresses. Prostitutes do it for profit. Protestants do it unwillingly. Psychiatrists do it for at least fifty dollars per session. Psychiatrists do it on the couch. Psychologists do it with rats. Psychologists think they do it. Public speakers do it orally. Pyrotechnicians do it with flare. Pyrotechnicians do it with a blinding flash. ^Top
- Q -
Quakers do it quietly. Quantum mechanics do it in leaps. Quantum physicist do it on time. ^Top
- R -
Racers do it with their horses. Racers like to come in first. Racquetball players do it off the wall. Radio amateurs do it with more frequency. Radio amateurs do it with two meters. Radio and TV announcers broadcast it. Radio engineers do it till it megahertz. Radio engineers do it with frequency. Radiocasters do it in the air. Radiologists do it with high frequency. Railroaders do it on track. Rally drivers do it sideways. Rangers do it in the woods. Rangers do it with all the animals in the woods. Raquetball players do it with blue balls. Real estate people know all the prime spots. Receptionists do it over the phone. Recyclers do it again and again and again. Reporters do it daily. Reporters do it for a story. Reporters do it for the sensation it causes. Republicans do as their lobbyists tell them to. Republicans do it to poor people. Research professors do it only if they get grants. Researchers are still looking for it. Researchers do it with control. Retailers move their merchandise. RISC assembly programmers do it 1073741824 times a second. Robots do it mechanically. Rocket scientists do it with higher thrust. Rocketeers do it on impulse. Roller-skaters like to roll around. Rolling Stones magazine does it where they rock. Roofers do it on top. Roosters do it coquettishly. Royal guards do it in uniforms. Rugby players do it with leather balls. Runners do it with vigor. Runners get into more pants.

Copyright © 2004 David K. Goodman. All Rights Reserved.
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